Thursday, 26 May 2011

The filing cabinet

Warning this is a post full of the laments of a sentimental old fool! Thank you for letting me indulge myself

I am a romantic dreamer at heart, I wear my heart on my sleeve, I spend a lot of time thinking, I get depressed easily. I believe in the innate goodness in everyone, I reflect a lot on the past and can cry easily. As an ex-patriot living in England there have been and are times when I find it hard to know where it is that I belong. I miss my kin, my own kind at times, there is no need for words or explantions there is just a mutual understanding. No words necessary.

Nostos = homecoming; Algia = pain

I love the meaning of nostalgia, I like the word a lot.

It describes a collection of hopes, dreams, losses and gains and was first used appropriately in Homer's The Odyssey. Interestingly enough, The Odyssey as you probably all know was about the Greek hero Odysseus and his long journey home after the fall of Troy. His wife Penelope, waited patiently for him remained faithful by fending off suitors by weaving by day and unravelling a tapestry night she said needed to be completed before she wed again. This clever decoy prevented her from marrying any other whist she waited for her beloved.

I like that my name and nostalgia have a connection.

So to put it in a nut shell I've been feeling nostalgic these past few days. I've had some time to think, day dream and reflect whilst Alice has been away and it never ceases tp amaze me how much I have developed a 'coping' mechanism to deal with my feelings of the past, my homeland and childhood spent in South Africa. I have a cerebral filing cabinet, it has drawers, folders, layers, papers filled with pictures, smells, tastes, sights, feelings, memories, dreams, sounds...

I have nostalgia compartmentalised.


What else could I have done? I needed to, I have to, otherwise a cloud would hang over me and I wouldn't be able to embrace this life, the here and now, the beauty, the joy, the all encompassing gracious life I have been given.

So what better to with these feelings but create. Create a little of my past, do something that I haven't done for years...... something very basic and simple but with so much meaning and a sense of nostagia for me..... play with buttons. Change something old into something new(ish) with buttons, something I used to do in my late teens and early 20's and it has felt GOOD.

I bought these beauties a little while ago

They are from the beautiful Rice in Denmark and sold in a pretty upholstery shop in Hastings Old Town. They made me feel nostalgic for my childhood and all those pretty homemade dresses my mum made for me and my sister and I knew these would find a very good purpose in my crafting.

So I chose one of my old cardigan's I bought in Gap about 12 years ago

It's 100% cotton and has been loved and worn a lot but I think it still has another few years left in it yet and so I got busy snipping off the original buttons (thank you kind person who originally sewed these on with such precision)and sewing on the new sweet buttons to give it a new life, something for the future, something which will one day feel nostalgic to me.

New life, New joy!

Simple but so me

My humble thanks to all of those who read and comment on my blog, it's really lovely to be in your company xox

24 hours until I have my precious child back


  1. I'm sure you're going to get the biggest and best hug and kiss from her tomorrow! Hope you have a wonderful weekend together, finding out all about what she's been up to. The cardigan is fantastic - the buttons are so sweet. x

  2. Your cardi looks beautiful with it's new special buttons, they are so pretty. xx

  3. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder- loving your 'new' cardi - xxx

  4. Love your cardi! It looks so lovely with your new buttons! I enjoyed reading your post, I love the story about nostalgia and your name, isn't it amazing!
    Have a great fun with Alice and enjoy your weekend of reunion!!! xoxo

  5. Lovely buttons. Great idea for refreshing a piece of clothing. I wish you a pleasant weekend with Alice.

  6. Catching up on blogs as I have been without internet for a week and how I have missed everyone, but having a lovely time reading. I never knew nostalgia meant that, something new I have learnt. Alice will be back by the time you read this, I bet you are very happy!!
    x Sandi

  7. Such a beautiful post.

    Nina x

  8. I'm catching up with your blog, I've added it to my Favourites so I don't miss any posts...
    As an ex pat myself, I felt my heart lurch when I read this post..we've been here for 7 years now. We love our new life 'children' are always in my mind and now I have the most beautiful granddaughter (nearly 1) living in Surrey..thank goodness for Skype, I see her every day.
    Take care
    Jude your work